my resolution

dear diary,
today i made a very important decision.... i've decided to finally start work on my novel... mama is right... i shouldn't waste my talent... if i can write well, i shouldn't be lazy and not write... so well ya, i've decided... and i'm thinking i'll base it in Assam, at least a good part of it... a little of it will be in Delhi too.,.. coz these are the two best places i know... i bounced around a few ideas with Lindy and got a good enough base storyline to work with... i've decided to consciously plan out stuff before i begin... coz i don't get my flashes like i used to before... and in any case, this isn't a short story i'm attempting... so for a novel, i can't just expect to get a flash of a picture and base my story on that... so i think planning everything out beforehand is a good idea... i don't know how Stephenie Meyer and J.K. Rowling got their ideas... i mean they say they dreamt about it and stuff but i really wonder if that's possible... i mean, to dream up a story is fine... but to dream up an entire novel?? and that too have three parts after that? sounds highly unlikely that that will happen to me... anyway, i want my novel to be one of those "coming of age" type novels... wonder what it'll turn out like but no one should be able to say that i didn't try... now, i'll get some of the details out properly and then will start actually writing it... i'm thinking i can include a lot of parts that i've just written and not continued with... i have a lot of spare stuff like that, that didn't turn into stories and stuff...  i want the novel to have a love angle in it too, but it didn't pan out in the ideas that Lindy and i talked about... i'm not sure what kind of an ending i want the novel to have though... i mean i'm okay with happy endings or sad ones or the ones in between... i call them the hopeful endings... the ones where there is a possibility of happiness but the author doesn't actually come out and say it... i like those kinda endings... i think my novel will have one of those... leaves the reader to think... doesn't give like a definite end to the story, you know... also, i want to be able to strongly describe what i talk about in the novels... so that's why i'm gonna base it on familiar ground... i know Assam, i've grown up there... so when i talk about Assam, i won't have to bullshit my way through... i also want to have strong bonds in my novel... not necessary of the usual friendships and all that... but whatever bonds are formed in the novel should be very definite... as in, not the black or white type of definite but the bonds should be there for the reader to make out... i'm so convinced about what i want and what i don't... i'm just hoping it comes out well... just praying to God that i have the strength to see this through... pls God, don't let me abandon this halfway like other stuff that i've taken up!!!!